Frequently Asked Questions

What is The Compassionate Friends Worldwide Candle Lighting®? The candle lighting is held annually as a way for all caring persons to remember those children who have died from any cause, at any age, regardless of cultural, ethnic, religious, or political boundaries. The Worldwide Candle Lighting is made up of hundreds of memorial services around the globe and thousands of smaller observances in the home with family and friends.

When is The Compassionate Friends Worldwide Candle Lighting? The event is held annually the second Sunday in December at 7 p.m. local time. Candles stay lighted for one hour in each time zone around the world creating a virtual 24-hour wave of light.

How large is the Worldwide Candle Lighting today?  No one really knows, but it is believed to be the largest mass candle lighting on the globe and is believed to have participants numbering in the hundreds of thousands. Last year TCF received information on over 360 formal worldwide candle lighting events taking place just in the United States. In addition, TCF received information on or was made aware of candle lightings in 13 countries outside the United States. Because families are encouraged to hold candle lightings in their home if they do not wish to, or cannot attend a formal candle lighting service, there are no doubt thousands of simple observances held with family and friends present.

How can I go about organizing a formal service? We’re happy to help. You may download the brochure on planning a general Worldwide Candle Lighting Service. TCF chapter leadership may download a copy of guidelines for TCF Chapter WCL services from the Chapter Leadership Website.

Does my organization need to be affiliated with The Compassionate Friends to hold a formal candle lighting? Definitely not. This is a worldwide event and all are welcome to participate in remembering beloved children gone too soon. We do ask you to fill out the online form advising us of your memorial service so that those who visit our site and live in your area may attend if they wish.

How does National Children’s Memorial Day relate to The Compassionate Friends Worldwide Candle Lighting? For many of the years of the Worldwide Candle Lighting, the United States Senate has joined in its observance through the unanimous passage of resolutions declaring the second Sunday in December National Children’s Memorial Day. TCF/USA appreciates our government’s understanding of what the Worldwide Candle Lighting means to so many.

Are there other opportunities to remember children during the Worldwide Candle Lighting? Yes. The Compassionate Friends national Website will feature a special remembrance book December 9 so that you may leave a message remembering a child, relating a special memory, or sharing a poem that has helped you in your grief. We encourage you to share your thoughts with others who understand and care. Many times over the years, events have been held either nationally or locally in conjunction with the Worldwide Candle Lighting that are not services, but in some way show a unique way of observing this special day. Please feel free to let us know if you have planned a special way of recognizing the Worldwide Candle Lighting and its meaning.

Where is The Worldwide Candle Lighting publicized? Every year publicity becomes more widespread with coverage before, during, and after The Worldwide Candle Lighting in hundreds of newspapers and on dozens of television stations. In the past, the event has been featured in Parade Magazine, Ann Landers column, Guideposts magazine, Annie’s Mailbox and even on a nationally syndicated television program. You will also find information on hundreds of websites. The Compassionate Friends encourages you to help publicize this meaningful event. Visit The Compassionate Friends national website often for links to newspaper articles about The Worldwide Candle Lighting as they are published.

What can I do to make this event even more successful? Everyone can help to spread the word whether by handing out Worldwide Candle Lighting buttons—order at TCF Exclusives--contacting newspapers and other media, placing posters on bulletin boards at  libraries, senior citizen centers, stores, and other locations, or coming up with a unique public awareness idea. We have heard from bereaved parents who went to their neighbors along their street and asked them all to light candles. Call or e-mail your friends and relatives and ask them to light a candle. If no local service is planned, you can be the person who makes a difference by organizing an event in your community. The ways in which you can make the Worldwide Candle Lighting even more successful are limited only by your own imagination.

What is TCF’s involvement and what is the history of the Worldwide Candle Lighting?

While the Worldwide Candle Lighting started out as a small Internet observance in 1997 by members of The Compassionate Friends, the national organization quickly decided to make this special day a gift to the bereavement community and all who provide support to bereaved family members following the death of a child. Through cooperation with allied bereavement organizations, The Compassionate Friends has watched the Worldwide Candle Lighting grow at a pace that has made it what is today believed to be the world’s largest mass candle lighting.

We do this . . . that their light may always shine!

The mission of The Compassionate Friends is to assist families toward the positive resolution of grief following the death of a child of any age and to provide information to help others be supportive.

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